Episode 14: Awakening to Life's Sacred Moments: Journeying Through "Wake Up Call" with Tom Rapsas

For the video version of this episode, go to: https://youtu.be/_iUn3yOo0yw

In this episode of "Spiritual but Not Religious" with Jill Dominguez, we delve into the profound insights of Wake Up Call by Tom Rapsas. Tom's journey mirrors many of our own as he navigates a departure from the confines of organized religion toward a more expansive spiritual understanding. Through his exploration of various traditions and thinkers, Tom shares with us the realization that true wisdom transcends any single belief system or authority.
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Links:

About Tom Rapsas and Wake Up Call:
https://www.tomrapsas.com

Andre Dubus II essay:
https://sites.up.edu/portlandmagazine/making-sandwiches-for-my-daughters/

NPR interview with Andre Dubus III:
https://www.npr.org/2023/08/01/1191357456/novelist-andre-dubus-iii

The Guardian article on awe:
https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2022/sep/23/how-getting-more-awe-can-improve-your-life-and-even-make-you-a-nicer-person

Richard Rohr on nonduality:
https://cac.org/daily-meditations/the-dualistic-mind-2017-01-29/

Eckhart Tolle interview "On Being":
https://eckharttolle.com/listen-on-being-with-krista-tippett/

Find SBNR episodes and more on the Spiritual But Not Religious Website and connect with me on Mastodon and YouTube!

Transcript

Welcome to another episode of Spiritual but Not Religious with Jill Dominguez. Today we’re going to explore the book Wake Up Call by Tom Rapsas. Many thanks to Wildhouse Publishing for providing a review copy.

Tom Rapsas has followed a path similar to my own. He was raised a Catholic, but found the rituals and dogma uninspiring. As he reached adulthood, Tom left organized religion behind. But while working a regular 9 to 5 job, he eventually came to feel the need for something more than his daily routine of eat-work-sleep.

As he embarked on a journey toward enlightenment, Tom began consuming everything he could regarding spirituality—from books on Hinduism, Buddhism, and Christianity to other inspirational works. These led Tom to realize that “true wisdom” can’t be gained from any one religion or learned person. Everything you read, everyone you meet, and every experience you have will contribute to your own spiritual insight.

In 2010 Tom began writing about his spiritual journey, and in 2012 he started a weekly online column called “Wake Up Call.” In that blog he expounds on ideas he has gleaned from other inspirational authors and podcasters. The book I’m reviewing here is an anthology of lessons from that ongoing endeavor. As you might expect in a collection of essays quoting writers who ponder similar questions, there is some duplication of thoughts and ideas throughout the book. But that’s not a bad thing, as the reader gains perspective on these ideas from different sources and from different angles.

“Wake Up Call” is divided into 16 chapters. Each chapter comprises one week of stories. Each day of the week features a story that falls into one of seven categories: Inspiration, Awareness, Character, Calling, Practice, Inner Work, and Christian Contemplation. Tom includes a helpful guide at the beginning of the book which describes each category. He also shares his intention for the book to serve as not just a collection of essays, but also as an introduction to various thinkers who may serve as valuable resources for the reader’s own spiritual development.

True to his stated intent, the book is filled with essays quoting different spiritual writers and his own interpretations of their words of wisdom. Tom recounts his takeaways from the life and works of Thomas Merton, Eckhart Tolle, Richard Rohr, Seneca, the Dalai Lama, and many others. The Self, the ego, the Gnostic Gospels, finding your purpose, and the definition of God are some of the many topics discussed.

One key concept that’s mentioned repeatedly in Tom’s essays is the importance of listening. Truly listening to others when they speak leads to deeper connections and understanding. Listening during prayer and contemplation may bring you answers to questions that you don't even realize you’re asking.

The first chapter of “Wake Up Call” focuses on living fully in the moment, taking the time to stop whatever you are doing throughout the day and just appreciate what is. This chapter includes a quote by author Andre Dubus ("Duh-BYOOSE”) about how he came to realize, as he prepared lunch for his kids each day, that each motion is a sacrament. Tom Rapsas wrote that “finding the sacred in sandwich-making” gives us a different way to see our many “I’m busy” moments throughout the day. I found the quote from Dubus’s essay, which is titled "Making Sandwiches For My Daughters,” even more moving when I read the whole essay. I’ll include a link in the transcript for this episode.

In the Week One / Day 6 section titled “Meditation Made Easy,” Tom talks about how the typical mantras—Ayum, I am, or Om—didn’t work for him; his mind would wander too often. During meditation, Tom says phrases such as “Love is Good. Love is God.” work better for him, keeping him more on task. I also find this to be true. I use Delta as a word for the infinite Nothingness in place of God. The meditation phrase I use most often is “Delta is accepting, so I am accepting.” This helps keep me mindful of what IS (instead of what should be or what should have been). Another very useful practice, which I covered in Episodes 7 and 8 of this podcast, is Neti-Neti meditation. Check it out if you haven’t already.

Several of the essays in “Wake Up Call” focus on how we can better live a more fulfilling life. In the Week Two / Day 2 essay, I especially like Tom’s take on a Guardian article on “awe” and how finding the awe in the ordinary can enrich our lives. He said, “When we teach ourselves to look past the things we know and expect, we may be surprised by what we see.…We may notice that the happiness and fulfillment we’ve been chasing have been with us all along.“

There is an especially pertinent message for our times in the Week Three / Day 3 essay. Tom distills a Dalai Lama quote down to “Do good. Don’t be a jerk.” He then suggests that, before you communicate an idea to others, you should ask yourself if it is True, Helpful, Inspiring, Necessary, and Kind—T-H-I-N-K. If what you have to say meets these criteria, then you are contributing to the world in a positive way. If not, THINK again before speaking or hitting Send on that email.

In the Week Six / Day 4 section, Tom includes “A Ten-Step Guide to the Next Phase of Your Life” with ideas taken from “Finding Grace” by Eiman Al Zaabi. The steps emphasize finding your purpose and making a difference in the world by using your talents to spread compassion and light wherever you are. I’m bookmarking this one.

The Week Seven / Day 7 passage talks about former Catholic priest Tom Stella and his realization that God is not some deity in the sky but a presence within everyone and everything. It’s been such a wonderful thing for me to discover that there are so many others who have found their way past Church dogma to feel this interconnectedness.

The Week Nine passages are a treasure trove of information and ideas for broadening your spiritual awareness. They include titles such as “Ten Valuable Life Hacks from the Urban Monk,” “The Dalai Lama and the Amazing Power of a Smile,” “The Lazy Person’s Guide to Meditation,” and “Ten Surprising Truths about Jesus (You Won’t Hear in Church).” One of my favorite quotes from these passages is in the 10th life hack from The Urban Monk: “Remember that everyone has something to teach you.”

The Week Ten / Day 6 chapter reminds us of the power of agape and how practicing this unconditional love and forgiveness can be healing. Tom quotes author Wendy Merron as saying, “Being angry is like holding a piece of burning coal in your hand and hoping the other person feels pain.” This is something I learned as I struggled to forgive the man who raped me. Holding onto the hatred and fear I still felt was only hurting me. Forgiveness leads to peace.

Another special moment comes to us in the Week Eleven / Day 1 passage. It includes the final thoughts shared with Tom by a friend who recently passed away. The text of the passage was taken from the last several curt emails Tom received as his friend’s health was failing, and it sums up the man’s recipe for a life of love and happiness in a very moving way. The main ingredient in this recipe is compassion. Tom’s friend wrote, “I believe that God resides in my own being and manifests itself in my acts of kindness, my simple sincerity, trying to respect each person I meet just as they are… .” Sincerity, kindness, respect. If everyone practiced these things, we all would be that much closer to Enlightenment.

The Week Twelve / Day 4 section is another that really spoke to me. It’s titled “How to Make the Most of ‘The Second Half’ of Life.” Tom includes quotes from David Brooks and his book “The Second Mountain.” Brooks describes the first half of life as The First Mountain, the time of life when you are working on achieving life goals such as a starting a career, raising a family, building relationships, and generally enjoying what life has to offer. Brooks describes the second half of life as “The Second Mountain.” During this stage of life you may start to see your purpose on Earth less as “What can I get out of life?” and more as “What can I give of myself to others?”

This observation became meaningful to me recently when I went to visit the doctor about some pain I was having. I asked her if it could be related to ovulation, and she said to me, “Not at your age.” In other words, I am definitely in that “second half” of life. I am traversing “The Second Mountain” and I’m inspired to spend this time by paring down my material possessions and giving as much love and support to others as I can.

In the Week Thirteen / Day 1 section of “Wake Up Call” I discovered an illustrated fable that I hadn’t heard of but that I must add to my library. It’s titled “The Boy, the Mole, the Fox and the Horse” and it’s written by Charlie Mackesy. Tom elaborates on seven key takeaways from the book. One of my favorites is number six on Tom’s list: “When the big things feel out of control, focus on what you love.” In other words, stop scanning social media and news headlines and focus inward and close to home. Appreciate what you have, especially the small things, and spread the love stored in your heart to those around you.

Another Week Thirteen passage explores the ideas of spiritual writer Tom Stella (formerly a Catholic priest) and Richard Rohr (a Catholic priest of the Franciscan tradition). They came to see Jesus not as some deity to worship but as a fully realized human, someone who lived a life of love and giving, someone we can all aspire to emulate. Jesus knew that God is intrinsic to all of us, and when we feel that connection we see the world with different eyes and realize that God is not separate from us in some faraway place; God is everywhere—in everyone and everything.

In my Roman Catholic upbringing, these ideas were never taught. The Holy Trinity—three separate yet intertwined incarnations of God—is doctrine. You can pray to the saints to intercede with God on your behalf; or you can tell a priest your sins and ask for forgiveness. It all seems to emphasize our separation from the divine. According to tradition, God is the creator of our world and Jesus is the Son of God. Jesus died to expunge our sins, so we worship him. The Holy Spirit is a separate entity—more of an individual experience than a spiritual connection with the rest of existence.

So I was delighted several years ago to discover the writings of Richard Rohr, a present-day priest, and those of 17th-century Dutch philosopher Baruch Spinoza. Spinoza was ostracized and banned from his Jewish community for his belief in a universal God—the Substance of the universe. Here in the 21st century, Richard Rohr writes books, has a website, and emails his “Daily Meditation” to thousands of people (including me). His writings suggest “seeing with the eyes of the mystics” and existing in nonduality, defined in today’s email as “a way of thinking, acting, reconciling, boundary-crossing, and bridge-building based on inner experience of God and God’s Spirit moving in the world.” Rohr’s version of the Catholic faith differs so much from the version I experienced that it seems to be something else altogether. It’s still based around traditional Catholic tenets but incorporates more of the Eastern philosophies, putting the ideas of the universal Self and cosmic unity front and center—a much more inclusive worldview.

Moving on to the Week Fourteen / Day 2 passage of “Wake Up Call,” we find a reference to the Latin phrase memento mori, which roughly translates to “Remember, you will die.” The concept of focusing your life around the idea that life is fleeting and could end at any moment has featured in many philosophies, including Stoicism, Judaism, Christianity, and Buddhism.

Tom Rapsas quotes a lesson from the “Waking Up” app by neuroscientist and philosopher Sam Harris. This lesson, titled “The Last Time”, urges you to “think about all the things in this life that you will experience for the last time.” When you practice memento mori, you keep in mind that each moment is precious and could be your last—but this doesn’t mean you must fear death. When you fear death, that fear overshadows the wondrous joys of life. When you acknowledge death as the final stage of life, you are free to appreciate each amazing second of your time in this world. By slowing down and taking in every experience with your full attention—literally Being in the moment—you come to appreciate the little things that you’ve been taking for granted and relish life as it Is.

There is much more information and inspiration to be found in “Wake Up Call.” I hope you find this book useful in your own spiritual journey. I’ll put links to more information about the author and his book in the episode description.

Until next time, this is Jill Dominguez for Spiritual But Not Religious. May you find the peace you are seeking.